it’s a long, often painfully awkward journey, but we all learn this eventually (or die alone with 30 cats trying)
(Source: brotips)
The idea “let it go” keeps rearing it’s ugly head. Yesterday night at work, towards the end of the night things were slowing down, we were coming off our wait. Part of my job is to make sure things in the front of the house are properly stocked at all times. Out of nowhere my boss gets frustrated at me, saying that certain things were not stocked as well as they could have been, saying “I don’t look like I’m hustling enough” and gives me a tirade on tip-outs. My mood dampened - was a server talking shit about me? What the hell was going on. I flipped. As the night wore on, I decided to talk to her, and straighten things out. She got defensive, and the mood soured - again. I should have just let it go.
Today in math class, my teacher attempted to “explain” the high number of “show more work” point deductions - it did not help. The class left still dissatisfied, and with more fuel for the fires of dissatisfaction. I am sure there will be more student dissent our outbursts in classes to come, and a lesser score on his www.ratemyprofessor.com page. He should have just let the issue go.
I’m still reading “the happiness project” and its messages keep resounding. Going to sleep angry doesn’t mean I’ll wake up angry. Sure my boss was being ridiculous, and venting her frustration improperly on me, but this is the only time it has happened in five months of working together. I could have let it go and everything would be fine. Students would still grumble, but without today’s dissertation, all but the most dissident would have quieted.
On an unrelated note, I found the blog website that Gretchen Rubin (the author of “the happiness project”) began. It’s different that I expected. It seems like a magazine, but all the articles (written over such a long period of time) are by her.
Swim Good -Frank Ocean
After two emotionally low weekend nights, I was happy at about midnight when I started texting a friend of mine whom I have failed to hang out with too many times recently. The conversation turned to more regular hanging out, and suddenly Wine Wednesdays. It’s not an original idea, but having a plan like that somehow just makes me feel really happy.
I came to the realization this weekend that I prefer to either hang out with friends, or go out to places where the only people I know are the ones whom I’ve come with and everyone else is a stranger (I’ve been discussing this preference with my CAPS counselor). At least it’s something to look forward to on Wednesday evenings that isn’t work or boredom. A nice wine buzz.
I recently began reading the book “the happiness project.” I have never been a big fan of inspirational or self-help books, however this one caught my eye as I was shopping at the grocery store by my house last week. I have been recently struggling with the idea of happiness, trying to figure out what makes me happy, and what I am looking for, and the overcast weather has not been helping my mood. I’ve been seeing a guy at CAPS, and now reading this book - two huge changes for me (I would never have dreamed of doing either of those a few months ago, much less blogging about them).
The book is written by a lawyer-turned-author who spent 12 months increasing her happiness in various ways, with a different theme for each month. Ironically the last post occurred just after I had finished reading her month relating to love. I think I’d like to start a happiness project, but with my current track record for completing projects, I’m not too hopeful - which in a bit of a catch-22 is one of the topics I can address in my own happiness project.
I am also reading Never Be Late Again, to try to fix some of my issues relating to timeliness, and was planning on reading “How to Make Friends and Influence People” however I lost the book right after I bought it somewhere at home. After I finish my current two books I can go home and find it. I’m hoping that book can help me with (m)any of the issues that I want to address in my relationships with the people around me and with myself.
[No Longer] Thinking About You - Frank Ocean
I was trying to write a remix of this for her too. It’s still a good song though.
Overall - great day. I didn’t take too many pictures, but instead reconnected with a friend from last year. Well we studied for our math midterm. I also talked to that one girl again. She’s freaking out about midterms. I wish I lived in Davis already.
I’ve arranged with my dad to move my things in on Saturday, and maybe pick up a few new things as well. I’m excited to go back to Davis, but I also have shittons of stuff to do still - in a good way. :D
the video is meh, but i’m feeling the song
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NOT ASHAMED.
John Green speaks to my heart, i just started Looking For Alaska today <3
twenty-fo’ seven!
